Branches of femoral artery

Professor femoral                  - profunda femoris
destroys excellent puddings  - deep external pudendal

Superiorly excellent puddings - superficial external pudendal
(are served at)
Epic                                         - superficial epigastric
Circuses                                  - superficial circumflex

Superior Orbital Fissure

Things travelling through the superior orbital fissure - just think of several octpus/octopi:

• Superior octopi - superior occulomotor
• Frolic - frontal (ophthalmic)
• (with) Lazy - lacrimal
• Trout - trochlear
• Inferior octopi - inferior occulomotor
• Absolutely - abducens
• Never - nasocilliary

Femoral Nerve

What does the femoral nerve supply? Just think of a female (femoral) from south africa (a "saffa") called sarah who is cute.

• Cute - cutaneous (medial and intermediate)
• Sarah - sartorius
• (the) Saffa - saphenous
• (has) Peculiarly - pectineous
• Vast - vastus
• Quadriceps - quadriceps femorsi

Cytochrome P450

Usefull stuff for remembering which drugs are induced, inhibited and metabolised by P450. Just remember these little stories:

 The things metabolised by P450 are:

• oral CONTRA ceptive pill
• anti-Epileptics
• Theophyline
• Cyclosporin
• Warfarin
• Statins

Immunology CD's

When trying to remember what CD's go with which MHC classes, just remember this:

*thanks to Jay for this one.

Wickham's Striae

Here's a way to remember the eponymous-ly named Wickham's Striae:

*thanks to Lucy for this one!

Bone-oma's

I find it difficult to remember the differences between osteoblastoma, osteoid osteoma, chondrosarcoma, and osteosarcoma. So here's how I remember:

• If it begins OSTEO and ends OMA then it happens at a young age (generally <40 years)
• If it begins CHONDRO then it's over 40's (so I think of John-drosarcoma and John Lennon being shot aged 40)

 And here are the amusing ways to remember which one is which:

HIV Antiretroviral Drugs

These drugs have ridiculous names. So this memory system may only work for me.

• NRTI's - just remember the four pictures: A lamb, a dove, ABBA and Dido.
• NNRTI's - think the first 2 N's look like mountains. Everest and (Ben) Nevis.
• PI's - all end in VIR except ABBAcavir
• FI's - there's only one and it has the letters FU (FUsion) in it. Enfuvirtide.

Carpal Tunnel

It's been a while since the last Really Easy Way to Remember something - so here's a nice simple one to get back into it:

Carpal Tunnel tests:

• Tinel's sign = Tinel's Tapping sign. Tap on the dorsal aspect of wrist.
• Phalen's test = Phalen's ph-lexion test. Wrist in maximal flexion.

Remember they're only positive if the pins and needles sensation is elicited distally (e.g. not +ve if there is pain when you tap on the wrist).

The Surgical Sieve

The consultant surgeon turns to you and barks "What are the causes of ____ " - all eyes are now on you to remember your surgical sieve and come up with the common as well as the wierd and wonderful. But wait, what was the mneumonic again?... On old mount olympus... no wrong one.... in a surgeons gown most... no don't think it was that one... was it something about vitamins?

Here's a little mneumonic which actually has something to do with surgical seive-ing. Just think of a sieve made of tin - a Tin Civ:

So that gets the most common causes to the top of your mind (trauma, infection, neoplasm), instead of coming up with a congenital disorder as your first answer.

Sulfonamides

More additions to the antibiotic range....

Sulfonamides (f vs. ph?? - it's an f in the BNF) are:
    TRI methoprim
    Co TRI moxazole

So think of someone from the network 3 (TRI) trying to sell you a phone: "sell-phone...amide.....sulfonamide".

The other antibiotics are available here.

Monoclonal Tumour Markers

• CA 125 = Ovarian Cancer
• CA 19-9 = Pancreatic Cancer
• CA 15-3 = Breast Cancer

 *these are usual associations, it is possible that each of these are raised in other cancers (CA125 also found in pancreatic, gastric, colonic, breast)

Alternative Bristol Stool Chart

Can't take the credit for this one (was one of my lecturer's) - it's a pretty good way of taking a bowel habit history:

B-cell lymphoma genetic links

Genetics of lymphomas - translocations cause overexpression of the following genes which cause the disease:

• myc - Burkitts + B & T-cell lymphomas
• bcl2 = follicular B-cell lymphoma
• bcl3 = chronic B-cell lymphoma
• bcl6 = diffuse  B-cell lymphoma
• any other genes = acute T-cell lymphoma

So you can use this mirror image to remember the bcl genes:

Kartagener's Syndrome

Here's another eponymous syndrome named Kartagener's (German physician, 1933)*. It's a triad of features:

• Dextrocardia or Situs inversus
• Brochiectasis
• Recurrant sinusitis

It's more scientifically known as primary ciliary dyskinesia - meaning cilia in the body don't beat properly. This is a problem during development where you need correctly beating cilia to put your organs in the right place (the cilia cause little waves of growth factor to swoosh around). If they beat the wrong way you get situs inversus or dextrocardia. If they don't beat at all it's situs ambiguus and organs end up in random places.

Here's my random picture for remembering this syndrome:

 

This heart (dextrocardia) in a cart (Kartageners) was traveling past a wrong way sign (..a..situs...sinusitis) and crashed into a tree (broken tree = broken bronchial tree = bronchiectasis).

* Kartagener M (1933). "Zur Pathogenese der Bronchiektasien: Bronchiektasien bei Situs viscerum inversus". Beiträge zur Klinik der Tuberkulose. 83 (4): 489–501.
* also... Situs Solitus is the normal positioning of organs in the body.

Cerebral Toxoplasmosis

Disease of the immunocompromised. Acute onset focal neurological deficit, usually hemispherical (hemiparesis, visual field disturbance). Can be accompanied by fever. Imaging shows characteristic ring-enhancing lesions:

Guillain-Barre Syndrome

Another eponymous syndrome named by a French physician at the turn of the century.

• It is an acute, inflammatory, post-infectious, ascending polyneuropathy (2:100,000).
• Caused by (??): post viral (often: Campylobacter jejuni or CMV) cell mediated response against peripheral gangliosides. 
• Polyneuropathy begins peripherally and progresses centrally - if it reaches respiratory/bulbar areas this is bad.
• Often causes autonomic dysfunction (sweating, tachycardia, dysrhthmias)
• CSF shows lots of protein  (>5.5g/L)
• Develops over around 4 weeks.
• Most important investigation: spirometry

So to remember these random facts I think of this knight character: Sir Guillain-Barre...

 * boot camp - to reflect that neuropathy often begins in feet (boot) and most commonly caused by CAMPylobacter Jejuni.
** also note pronounciation - gwee-awn barr-ay (in your best french accent)

Pleural Effusions

Pleural effusions can be exudative (>30g/L protein) or transudative (<30g/L protein). Things that commonly cause effusions of each type are:

Also light's criteria - if any of the following are true then = exudative:

• Pleural/Serum protein ratio > 0.5
• Pleural/Serum LDH ratio > 0.5
• Pleural fluid LDH > 2/3 of serum LDH level.